5 years ago, I finally realised my dream to go abroad for one year as an exchange student. I had the great opportunity to live 1 year in Brazil in 3 different families. At first I was scared to go there cause I didn’t speak any Portuguese. But soon enough I realised it didn’t matter that much cause people were so kind to me that I quickly fell in love with this country! Cause the Brazilian experience was so incredible, I really wanted to go back to visit my family and friends. I saw it was possible to apply as a volunteer at the olympic games of Rio de Janeiro. I applied in 2014. After loads of online interviews, online classes and a hit of patience I got finally chosen to take part at the olympic volunteering team!
As I was lining up to see the opening ceremony, there was this guy, Silvanio, who came up to me and asked me if it was the line for the Gate H. We started talking about everything and nothing. Then as we were supposed to split up, he asked me for my number so that we could contact each other again and let me discover the city. You understand, I wasn’t going to say no to a free guided tour by a Carioca! He got back in touch with me and after a few messages, he asked me how I would react if he was flirting with me. I freaked out like never before and probably turned white. At that time I still haven’t came out. I was freaking out to tell him that I was actually gay… But I thought it was maybe the opportunity to finally accept myself, then I jumped at the chance to finally admit it to someone!
He contacted me more than once so we could meet, but I wasn’t ready to take full plunge yet. Finally we stayed at the message stage, but he reassured me about many things. He is the person that initiate my coming out and that delivered me from that guilty feeling I’ve always had! Finally I realized that it was possible to be gay and happy, to be understood, to be accepted and appreciated by your loved ones. So I promised myself that when I went back to second year university in Brussels, I would be honest with myself and my family. I started to tell my friends and family about it little by little and honestly it was not a very big deal!
I remember my mother’s reaction, who just said “oh, okay” like I just told her I ate a slice of Nutella bread for breakfast! Or my brother who told me “so here, in the video clip, you’re looking at the guy and not the hot chicks? ». Once I decided to come out, a whole new world opened up for me. That’s it, I could finally be who I was, with my feelings, my desires and I was ready to embark on this new adventure! I had so much frustration in me and the feeling that I missed so much that I wanted to make up for lost time… The idea of having a relationship with a guy quickly became concrete and to be honest, if today you asked me if I would have liked to be straight, I would answer you with a big “NO”!