Imagine discovering the person you’ve been chatting with online lives just two doors down. Now the person you’ve been sending nudes to isn’t some stranger in your city, but your literal neighbor. Years later, I can definitely appreciate Grindr for making that connection because, without it, Alex and I might never have met. From awkward introductions, we quickly became friends, playmates, boyfriends, and now husbands.
Our connection has deepened through the ways we support each other, especially during tough times. Just a month before our wedding, Alex was laid off from his job. Six months later, I faced the same fate. Both of us, working in tech, were hit hard by the rolling layoffs post-COVID. It wasn’t the easiest start to our marriage, but those challenging times laid a solid foundation for our partnership. We’re both fiercely independent, so learning to rely on each other was a new experience. But I’m grateful we learned how to do this early on in our relationship.
I think we’ve both found something really special in this connection. Growing up, neither of us ever imagined being so open with someone, but with Alex, it feels natural. I grew up with a single mother and she taught me to depend on myself, so I never thought I’d need someone else. Even now, I don’t think I need anyone, but I’ve learned how much I want and appreciate having someone. Alex is my person, and I’m thankful every day for this connection.
Our relationship has been about embracing each other’s complexities. Alex is calm, sensitive, and driven; I’m creative, emotional, and persistent. This balance helps us navigate the chaos of life together. We’ve learned to support each other’s strengths and work through our weaknesses. Intimacy plays a significant role in our bond. We’re both pretty kinky; Alex is my bratty leather pup, and I’m his soft dom handler. This dynamic allows us to explore our connection in ways that are both tender and empowering.
Alex is from Russia, and the conflict between Russia and Ukraine led his family to relocate to Cyprus. Traveling to Europe so I could meet his family was a pivotal moment for us. It was this journey that brought us to Cyprus, where we met Chris, who captured these amazing photos. That sunny day on the beach felt like a full-circle moment, a perfect reflection of our journey—bright, warm, and filled with promise.
I find it ironic that Alex, with his severe allergy to dogs, is my pup in our play. Sharing all of our desires openly and without judgment has taken some practice for sure, and has completely transformed our connection. Embracing our kinks has enhanced our communication and given us freedom from shame. As we grow up, society expects us to let go of playfulness and conform to adult norms. But kink centers pleasure, play, and freedom, allowing us to embrace our playfulness and stay honest. In a world where so much of our lives, gay or otherwise, is about hiding parts of ourselves, it’s transformative to be in a relationship where there’s no need to hide.