March 2024
By Chris Chi
Sharing stories about us
Hello beautiful people,
Time flies. I think I lost the sense of time when trying to keep myself occupied with activities, meeting up new people…The Darklands happened in March, the beginning of March, where I was asked to do a photoshoot of a fisting orgy by Axel Abysse. It gave me a perfect excuse to visit the darklands. I met Javier and Francisco, a cute Mexican couple with whom I shared an instant connect. After the photoshoot I brought them to an authentic Chinese restaurant in Antwerp, we ordered spicy boiled pork. I was amazed when Francisco squeezed some lemon in the spicy broth and drank it all. Then there’s Flavian, Jose, Peter and Eduardo. Each of them gave me some warm and intimate moments. So I think March is actually a good month, despite of the fact that I am trying to getting used to living on my own after my mom left Belgium. Of course, I have to talk about the new taleofmen zines which are available now. I am super proud and grateful, especially at this period of time. It’s a great feeling to get the kickstart project fulfilled and have the zines in my hands. Thanks a million!
FLAVIAN
(Falvian in Brussels, 03/2024)
The boy is called Flavian. I met him in Brussels. “Are you French?” I asked despite knowing very little about him. He confirmed it. He exuberates the French flair if there’s such a thing, mysterious, charming, self-confidence, romantic and a bit of “je ne sais quoi” feel…”Flavian, that’s an unusual name”. I said. “Florian” is more common, but “Flavian” is more enigmatic, just like his piercing blue eyes. After the photoshoot, I googled Flavian and was amused by the fact that there’s once the Flavian dynasty that ruled the Roman Empire from AD 69 to AD 96. Interesting fact and very interesting numbers!
Flavian is beautiful. There’s no doubt about that. He’s wearing a white T shirt under a casually large jumper. When he was only wearing the white T shirt, it gave me this MENATPLAY vibe, quite sexy, I smiled. He is very aware of his own beauty. His blue eyes, brown curly hair, moustache, rosy lips…installed meticulously on this Angel face. You could feel his confidence even though he had only done 2 photoshoots before. Every time when he looked into the lens, I couldn’t stop pressing the shutter button to capture it.
He is the last photoshoot I did in Brussels this month. So the photos still need to be edited while waiting for his story. Let’s all be patient and that’s something to look forward to once I am back from the holiday.
MEMORY
(Ari in Athens, June 2023)
This is the first time that I actually visited Athens in the summer. I have been to Greece a few times, but always in low seasons, meaning April or November. I remember spending Christmas in the Airbnb in Athens, drinking red wine while talking with people on Instagram, having a great time. This time is different. Summer, Athens was soaked in sunlight. A local once told me, when the temperature get higher, people get hornier. I don’t doubt it at all.
I met Ari again. We went straight to the beach, his beach as he said. In his car, we could already feel the heat. He’s wearing a tank top and a short, I couldn’t wait until the beach before I snapped some photos of him in the car. His nipples, his cock, his armpits, the classics. The sunlight fell perfectly on his body. We were in a very good mood.
His beach is not far from Athens, closer than Limanakia where I usually go for photoshoots. This spot has no name, he said. Then he marked it on my google map so I could revisit it again. We walked down the small path, then there it was. Rocky seashore with blue water and fresh breeze. There was nobody else. A private beach for us! We got naked, feeling the sun and the water. Ari looked great. I am so jealous of people who live close to the sea. They are as if all sons of the sea god, born blessed.
I remember Ari’s skin. It’s so soft. Even though I knew it already (since it’s our 2nd time meeting up and doing photos), I was still amazed by it. He lost some weight, slimmer than the last time. His hair had a golden hue under the sun, a detail that I liked a lot. When taking breaks, Ari sat on the rocks and vaped. We both looked out to the boats ferrying between Athens and the Aegean islands. It’s really nice.
TWO FRIENDS
I shot 80 film rolls on my last Berlin trip. It was not planned but I was doing as many photoshoots as possible in order to be active. The memory of my husband’s passing was still too refresh to cope, so I made sure that I was occupied and exhausted. Even that didn’t stop me from breaking down from time to time. Nevertheless, I enjoyed meeting the boys. Some of the encounters are very comforting and healing. Like, with Andreas, in his apartment, I saw his drawings, and photos. He even made a drawing of me a while ago. We listened to “You were always on my mind” on his speaker and we hugged. A very cute moment.
Back in Brussels, I took the time to scan the rolls and edit the photos. Besides going to the GYM, this has been the main activity of March. I did enjoy it. It’s something about shooting analog. You always get surprised and even get emotional when you see certain photographs for the first time. Some photographs are very hot and sexy, but it’s the sentimental ones that make me spend nights looking at them, thinking about them. It’s these ones that give me great satisfaction as if I have achieved something important. They have this eternal quality, at least to me.
Santi and Jorge are two friends who call each other “confidant”. They are both from Spain. When we managed to meet at Jorge’s place at a cloudy afternoon, we had just minimum amount of natural light from his window. I couldn’t explain why. I wanted to capture something sentimental. Perhaps it’s the greyness, the gloomy atmosphere, or the connection they had with each other. I directed more than I usually did, even though I was not 100% sure about the results that I would get on film. This was not that important anymore. I simply loved how their bodies connected and complemented each other, how beautiful simple poses could be.
After I scanned all the films I was touched by these images. I couldn’t complain, but the song “What was I made for” by Billie Eilish kept playing in the background. Then I was crying. “Coz I don’t know how to feel, but I wanna try…Coz I don’t know how to feel, but some day, I might…”.
Despite the melancholy, I loved the beauty of this encounter, meeting Santi and Jorge. It will always stay as a special moment. For that, I am grateful.
Written by Jorge:
Santi and I have been friends for about 3 years. But we met a year before that, just when Iarrived in Berlin. It was a more sexual and casual encounter, but I always remember himsaying that we were going to end up being friends, because I was monster material as he says. And he calls us “monstruas” with affection, referring to the way that the normative society saw us. And so it was, a few years later, Santi and I are good friends and a bit “monstruas”.
This photo shoot made me think about the relationship I have with my body and the nudity and how it is linked to Berlin and in parallel to this encounter with Santi. I have always been attracted to being naked, to showing my body and enjoying it. But my 30s and my arrival in Berlin were decisive in breaking me free. Previously, there were many situations in which I felt ashamed or judged for my nudity. The artistic environment, however, always served me as an escape, cabaret, performances, etc. were my way of freeing my body and my feelings.
At the age of 30, I decided to study design and then to come to Berlin, suddenly my artistic escape disappeared in Berlin. Then I embraced the freedom that this city offered me. The club nights, the FKK culture, the cruising… and above all the acceptance of this as a natural thing. Enjoying sex and the body without pretensions. All my friends here know my body and have seen me enjoy it too, and that’s liberating, I don’t have to hide anything from them.
I will not deny that there is always a judgement, which is almost inevitable and sometimes still affects me. But this sentiment has lost much of its importance. I could say that I stopped wearing the mask, and started to enjoy my body as Jorge, and not as a character. And my friendship with Santi is parallel to all this process, is nearly a symbol of this new status, in which I feel empowered about my body and sexuality.
—–
HERE is the reel that I made with Santi & Jorge’s photos and the song “What was I made for”. Wishing the world more caring and more love.
ONE AFTERNOON
In one cold afternoon under the warm lights of a charming Antwerpen downtown hotel.
We met.
We talked.
We kissed and fucked.
We forgot out loneliness and took comfort in each other’s arms sharing our intimacy and our time in this finite life of infinite possibilities.
I would’ve never imagined that the hug I wanted to give you on that nostalgic winter would be delivered straight into your arms a couple of months later.
For that I remain amazed on how small the world is.
You are stronger than you think.
Hugs and kisses….
FEATURED ARTIST: ADrian Alarcon
Photos by Adrian Alarcon
Website: https://www.alarconadrian.com/
Adrian is one of my models who I met in Berlin. Orginally from Spain, he started to document the queer life/love scence in Berlin with analog photography and integrated himself in this unique Berlin culture. His photos are unpretentious and authentic. They offer us a glimpse of a diverse universe where freedom is celebrated.
His work has been published in the latest Taleofmen Sex Zine 2.
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