I am so happy to please people lately. I love entering in a room and seeing guys already naked and waiting for me on their couches or beds. To hear their voices for the first time while they moan out of pleasure, discovering their bodies through touch and with my body. Trying to sense every cells of their body with my skin.  I think it is so unbelievably clear when bodies are available to been seen and to be touched. How amazing when someone leaves you in control of their body and they trust you will give them pleasure and you will be considerate towards them. 

I spend lots of my time unconsciously studying bodies while having sex, trying to see if they feel the pleasure by me touching spots I know are generally triggers for pleasure. And, if those spots are not the ones then I venture myself into looking for those. I love to hear and feel when they get taken by surprise by me licking or touching an erogenous zone. I think it is extremely important to communicate with your partner what you enjoy, but it can be such a satisfying journey to discover such things.

I remember entering in this apartment once and seeing this beautiful man sitting on his couch, legs open and dick hard rock. He did not whispered a word to me, but looked at me and I just walked towards him, knelled and started to suck. I knew what to do , I knew what that look meant, the situation was familiar and readable and I was in control of it. 

The common mistake is thinking that the person who is performing a more sub role is powerless and alienated. This is such a huge mistake, I know what I want, I know what to do and I am as much as in power as the dom. Of course there is exchange of power, of course there is a power imbalance, this is what the game is about. But that doesn’t undermine my identity and my person. (…) 

My body got suddenly very warm, I can feel rushes of heat flowing inside my body. My head was being pushed towards his cock and I was taking it all in. I don’t wanna leave a single cm out. I admit I felt a sense of achievement managing to take such a big cock in my mouth. I was still very aware of my own pleasure, but I felt like concentrating on his right now. Because indirectly this become about me sucking his cock, not just about his cock being sucked.

I think this is what turns me on, the psychological game in which I become someone else’s porn. But, not just a shabby, boring, bi-dimensional porn. But that secret porn you don’t tell people about. That porn in which you feel safe and respected and you can confess your dirtiest secrets because you know you won’t be judged, perhaps the other person will be available to make that fantasy a reality.

All of this was rushing through my head while I was still playing with his huge cock, gosh I had not seen such a big one in a long time. I kept on thinking : how can I serve you? What can I do for you? How can I make this shabby and shallow hookup date in something more? Because isn’t it the point? To make you remember me, when one day you bump into me in the street? To make you have a sudden flashback of you sitting on your couch and me devoting myself to your pleasure. And make you grow an instant small boner, just with a look. And just like the first time we met, you won’t say a word, but you will look at me in a way that will make me understand. (…)

What about that day we met and you just politely came towards me and started to talk and ask me about my life almost as if we knew each other. I mean we did , but not in that way. You seemed genuinely interested . Every time I asked you about your job or your life you deflected the attention so elegantly, there was always something more convenient to talk about than to talk about your life. Don’t even know your name. At this point I can only imagine that the only thing you want to do with me is to bring me to the steam room and fuck me right there. You are  just probably too polite and too high to ask me to join you there.

I wonder if that is what I am hoping though. To have an excuse to dump all my expectations on you, and to have the right to blame you in case you disappoint me. To just make sure I come out of the story with clean hands. Because you just wanted to fuck me, and I liked you for real! All the time I texted you and you did not answer. I liked you for real! Did I though? What did I really like about you? I knew nothing!! Maybe it was just so comfortable being fucked from time to time and blaming you for not being who I wanted you to be.

Perhaps being fucked in the steam room of “BOILER” in Berlin is exactly what I want. Just wanting to have you inside me, to feel the struggle to take that big cock in and to shamelessly scream of pleasure in front of this group of men who are jerking off while watching us. I guess now my fantasy is complete, having a group of strangers considering us something we are not; because you kept everyone who approached their dick to me at a distance. You just wanted them to watch. And you knew I would have just obeyed you cause my pleasure is feeling yours.