I have not done any photoshoot for a long time. I wonder if I still know how to do it, how to perform, how to strike a pose, how to behave. Will I be comfortable? Is being naked in front of a lens still so comfortable and obvious for me?
First, when I met Chris – I felt a sense of excitement; the excitement of being on a set, on a stage. And the stage was this hotel room in Paris.
When I was younger, before being in front of lenses, I was behind the camera. I discovered early when I was a kid the power of light and how subtle light changes can make a huge difference. I got a strong interest in light, cause lighting is everything in any image.
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When I was in front of Chris’ camera, I couldn’t stop thinking “lighting”. When I even thought of pulling the curtain to get a nice background. I was thinking of the lighting, how rays of light were meeting my skin here and now.
I was imperceptibly moving to make tiny adjustments – closing my eyes to imagine the light. At one point, I told to myself, forget “lighting” be here, be real, be you.
In most pictures you can see me closing my eyes, it is because I wanted to give you the truth. When closing my eyes, I feel my soul with a high degree of clarity. That’s what that means for me.
The plan was to do a shoot “with underwear”. We started shooting in underwear with one of my favorite unbranded black briefs. I put music on with Chris’s Bluetooth speaker and started to play London Grammar, the last album. I was thinking: Hannah ‘s deep and pure voice will help me to find “pure emotion” and the mystical arrangement will help me to switch from “day to day life to “stage life”.
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To start with, I found in the window comfortable support. Although I got this support, I wasn’t still. Everything was sparkling inside of me and I started moving slowly. It was actually dancing, not moving.
In the lockdown, I deepened my yoga practice thanks to steady Ashtanga yoga practices. This started to color how I move and dance. Naturally, my body suggested to Chris a lot of weird contortions. Some of them were empty, some of them were gold gems – not to miss.
This bed in this hotel room was a real playground for me. It was far more comfortable than the stool. I started to play with the duvet – going inside and out, partly inside, partly out.
I was actually dancing in slow motion for Chris and I think Chris honored my performance. When changing film rolls, he told me ” This is my new record in terms of film rolls”. I think I was expressing something and Chris was catching it.
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