I have not done any photoshoot for a long time. I wonder if I still know how to do it, how to perform, how to strike a pose, how to behave. Will I be comfortable? Is being naked in front of a lens still so comfortable and obvious for me?
First, when I met Chris – I felt a sense of excitement; the excitement of being on a set, on a stage. And the stage was this hotel room in Paris.
When I was younger, before being in front of lenses, I was behind the camera. I discovered early when I was a kid the power of light and how subtle light changes can make a huge difference. I got a strong interest in light, cause lighting is everything in any image.
When I was in front of Chris’ camera, I couldn’t stop thinking “lighting”. When I even thought of pulling the curtain to get a nice background. I was thinking of the lighting, how rays of light were meeting my skin here and now.
I was imperceptibly moving to make tiny adjustments – closing my eyes to imagine the light. At one point, I told to myself, forget “lighting” be here, be real, be you.
In most pictures you can see me closing my eyes, it is because I wanted to give you the truth. When closing my eyes, I feel my soul with a high degree of clarity. That’s what that means for me.
The plan was to do a shoot “with underwear”. We started shooting in underwear with one of my favorite unbranded black briefs. I put music on with Chris’s Bluetooth speaker and started to play London Grammar, the last album. I was thinking: Hannah ‘s deep and pure voice will help me to find “pure emotion” and the mystical arrangement will help me to switch from “day to day life to “stage life”.
To start with, I found in the window comfortable support. Although I got this support, I wasn’t still. Everything was sparkling inside of me and I started moving slowly. It was actually dancing, not moving.
In the lockdown, I deepened my yoga practice thanks to steady Ashtanga yoga practices. This started to color how I move and dance. Naturally, my body suggested to Chris a lot of weird contortions. Some of them were empty, some of them were gold gems – not to miss.
This bed in this hotel room was a real playground for me. It was far more comfortable than the stool. I started to play with the duvet – going inside and out, partly inside, partly out.
I was actually dancing in slow motion for Chris and I think Chris honored my performance. When changing film rolls, he told me ” This is my new record in terms of film rolls”. I think I was expressing something and Chris was catching it.
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