First evening

We discuss, we exchange. To begin with, of course, a few trivialities.  I hope you don’t notice it but I literally drink your words.  I’m hanging on your lips.  Our thighs brush against each other, it titillates me.  I sip on the wine and I feel my inhibitions are dropping.  The sun is setting, it is dark.  You switch on the lamp next to the television.  Your sweater slides up, I see your lower back, I see your skin.  I’m imagining your butt.  I bite my lip.  We continue our conversation, our exchanges.  It flows, there is no silence, no passing angel, just the devil in the body, the one I’m trying to restrain. Because I want you.  

The evening goes by very quickly, we forget to eat.  There is just drunkenness.  You light a cigarette.  You smoke.  I’m breaking down.  I love it when you inhale the smoke and release it in the shape of a circle.  I love the blue swirls that fog me up.  My eyes are itchy.  I have a dry throat.  I want your mouth, I want your skin.  I want you.  But I still sit by your side and I observe you, I admire you. Then you say it’s late, that we should go to sleep. I don’t know if you are suggesting that I stay to sleep with you or if I have to go home. I hope you want me as much as I want you.  But I’m not saying anything, I don’t want you to think I’m debauched, depraved.  You come closer, I breathe faster. You put your mouth on mine, you place your right hand on my neck. I feel your warmth. This time I am breathless. 

First, there is gentleness, modesty and a little restraint.  Then there is agitation, our mouths bustle, our tongues mingle.  You taste like cold tobacco, I don’t mind that. Our hands take hold of our hair, our necks, our hips.  There is passion, excitement and this delicious weakness. Our clothes are falling, our skins are touching, I have your chest against mine. My breathing matches yours.  You take me to the bedroom. We drop onto the bed. We caress each other, we hold each other, we kiss. There is a little restraint, the restlessness subsides, our bodies calm down, so do our hearts. We’re not going any further. We understand that this moment must be preserved, that it should not be thrown away, that it should be taken care of. I settle into your arms and I’m fine. Your hands are large, they caress me, then they hold still. I feel your breath on my skin. I love your naked body against mine.  I am peaceful, I am serene. We fall asleep.

Second evening

I’m more comfortable than the day before, the second date feels softer, less tense. Our bodies have already met, our skins have touched, it’s easier to resist. Still I’m excited but I don’t show it. You lie down on the sofa, you light a cigarette. I put my face on your stomach. You look at the ceiling. I hear your heart pounding, I can feel your lungs empty with each exhale and fill with each puff of smoke. I think that must be exactly happiness. You look up, say nothing more. It’s a nice moment, very sweet, very slow, very intense. Nothing is happening, and this nothingness is almost everything. It’s just my body against yours.  

We remain motionless for a long time in the middle of the living room, on your sofa. Through your jeans, I feel your cock harden. Your excitement is palpable, I understand that you want me. I no longer resist. We reproduce the same gestures as the previous evening. Except that this time we are staying in the living room. There are our tongues, our saliva, your cock against mine. It’s feverish, it’s hot, it’s humid too. You are much more active than the day before. You turn me over, you put me down. Your sweat mingles with mine. More humidity. And then there is this submission, this abandonment. You penetrate me. It’s hard, it’s soft. Now there is only the sound of our bodies brushing against each other, our flesh bumping, our sighs, our cries and pleasure. Then again silence. Your body is against mine.

You are hot, you are sweating.  Your breathing has gone wild, it slows to its normal rhythm, I feel your breath on my neck. I am exhausted, worn out. We slowly come to our senses. You get up and take my hand, you whisper to me: “Come!  We’re going to take a shower”. The water has been flowing over us for several minutes. I like to be in your arms. I think my body fits perfectly with yours, my dark skin matches perfectly with your fair skin. I think I am fine. We go to sleep. We entwine and we fall asleep. It’s that silence again. It’s not oppressive, it’s not disturbing. He’s a rocker, he’s fluffy. I think this is the second night we spend together and I pray that there will be more, that there will be many more.